Blink of an Eye

#17 - In the Foxhole

#17 - In the Foxhole

 

Our egos and fear can overwhelm us when we are deep in the foxhole on the front lines of trauma. It was life and death as Archer struggled to breathe, both lungs collapsed. Louise had to let go of some of her old ideas about what is “proper” and just let all the rawness come out as she instinctively felt she needed to circle her troops, her community, her friends. In the midst of this unfolding trauma, she discovers a friend whose presence she felt the first time their eyes met but didn’t realize it was so mutual and so divine until Cathy G. confirmed the story. Louise also begins to explore with listeners the potential of trauma-informed Intensive Care Units and medical courses in trauma and trauma healing for nurses and doctors as part of core medical school curricula and gives a shout out to other SCI folks.

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 16 In the Foxhole

August 7. DAY 3. 

In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from

Paula Senft Easton, Louise’s eldest child, and only daughter, and Archer’s sister, who was 24 at the time of Archer’s accident and is today the Associate Director of Admissions for the Friends School in Baltimore

and

Cathy Giannascoli, a friend in Pennsylvania and the Senft family’s summer neighbor in Cape May

 

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

This episode is sponsored by the Desatnick Foundation. You can find more info about it at https://desatnickfoundation.org/.

#16 - You Gotta Go Through It

#16 - You Gotta Go Through It

 

Their pain and trauma is YOUR pain and trauma. This is how it can be when we watch a loved one suffering in any way. It may be simpler to wall off, bury it, or choose not to acknowledge it to lessen trauma’s grip. Oh, going that route can cause so much damage to your body, including your organs, and your ability to deal with future traumas. Nope, you can’t avoid it. You gotta go through it, sooner or later. Walk through the experience with Louise and her pillar of strength, Paula, her daughter, as they revisit how trauma of a loved one can reduce you to a spent dandelion being blown randomly in the wind. Louise will share with you a pathway to trauma healing that your bodily sensations hold for you as a guide.

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 16 You Gotta Go Through  It

August 7. DAY 3. 

In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from

Paula Senft Easton, Louise’s eldest child, and only daughter, and Archer’s sister, who was 24 at the time of Archer’s accident and is today the Associate Director of Admissions for the Friends School in Baltimore

and

Cathy Giannascoli, a friend in Pennsylvania and the Senft family’s summer neighbor in Cape May

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#15 - Soothing Texts -- What (Not) to Text

#15 - Soothing Texts -- What (Not) to Text

 

It’s not that we aren’t appreciative of the offer of help from others, but sometimes you just want to scream, “STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS!” What about the innocent question, “Is there anything I can do to help?” and similar questions when we or our loved one is in an intensive care unit, or in the throws of early trauma. Caring people don’t realize the stress that chit-chat big everyday questions add. What is demanding and what is not? And Louise looks harder at the, “Oh, it’s a blessing” reply when a loved one who was suffering dies, no matter how old. Intended to be consoling, but is it? Many of these words fall under the heading, “What not to text.” Louise explores the kind of texts that are soothing to someone in trauma, and she begins an unfolding explanation of how we can understand trauma more fully. 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 15 Soothing Texts -- What (Not) to Text

August 7. DAY 3. 

In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from

Dr. Kris Radcliff, a spinal surgeon with the Rothman Institute in Philadelphia and Archer’s neck surgeon at Atlanticare in 2015

and

Mary Lou Healy, a middle school math teacher at the Cathedral School in Baltimore in 2015 at the time of Archer’s accident, and now teaching at Calvert Hall High School.

 

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

 

#14 - What Not to Say

#14 - What Not to Say

 

Louise saw the ashen look on her daughter’s face as they passed in the doorway. She was confused until she heard what the nurse had told Paula, Pete, and Archer, “It’s just swelling.” One sentence was a gut punch sucking the hope out of the room and maybe the life out of her son. Louise was in a hateful fury over the insensitivity of someone who was supposed to be looking out for Archer’s well-being. How do we overcome the hurts of others’ heartless words? People in authority wield a lot of power. This includes nurses. But they are not all-knowing, are they? 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 14 What Not to Say August 7. DAY 3. 

Paula Senft Easton, Louise’s eldest child, and only daughter, and Archer’s sister, who was 24 at the time of Archer’s accident and is today the Associate Director of Admissions for the Friends School in Baltimore

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#13 - Some Things Stay the Same

#13 - Some Things Stay the Same

 

Preparing visitors for what to expect when visiting your loved one in a trauma unit is critical. It’s stunning how quickly we see the new normal of machines, tubes, and life support, but it can be shocking to first-time and especially younger visitors. They may think they’ll be in the way, and they may be frightened, but the recovery of Archer is dependent on familiar faces showing up and bringing some normalcy. Most of all, such visitors allow Archer, who is tragically altered, to still be seen as himself, despite the horror of what may have been the first recognition of the new reality. 

 

The traumatic event doesn’t just impact the patient; it impacts all those around especially the ones closest to the patient. And the emotional roller coaster can cause lasting damage to their bodies. The patient needs support in every way. So do the family caregivers. Listen in for ways we can take care of the insides of our bodies to be of greatest service to those we are protecting and caring for during and after the unfolding of a traumatic event, so we can continue to show up. 

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 13 Some Things Stay the Same August 7. DAY 3. 

In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from

Robby Black, a Baltimore McDonogh high school lacrosse friend of Archer and of Louise’s son, Dewey

Bobbie Austin, a Baltimore McDonogh high school lacrosse friend of Archer and of Louise’s son, Dewey

 

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#12 - Holding it Together

#12 - Holding it Together

 

Random strangers entering the room day and night, her family not allowed to all be together, and medical staff thinking she was crazy without saying so. Louise still managed to go into auto-pilot as a mediator and take notes of everything that was happening. Trouble was, she, in moments of her own trauma, couldn’t write her name or realize which of her five children was in trauma. How does the brain manage trauma? She gives a rare inside look at how it really is when you are just barely holding it together in shock. If we are lucky, we have family with us, and until then a few surrogate family members standing by us, holding us up before our immediate family arrives. Dear friends slip into that role if we are lucky. If not, even a caring stranger can provide temporary stability to ensure our safety and prevent our mental collapse.

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 12 Holding it Together August 7. DAY 3. 

In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from 

Leah Marino Barsby, from Philadelphia, the then-girlfriend, now wife of Davis Barsby, who was part of Archer’s rescue off the beach at the Beach Club in Cape May

 

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#11 - What to Say

#11 - What to Say

 

Sometimes the unexpected - like a Color War - is the natural solution to ease into and ensure that life goes on after the delivery of bad news. At least that’s how it was for Louise and her family when they needed to tell their youngest son, Dutch, who was away at camp, what had happened to his big brother two days ago.

 

How much is too much bad news to share with your children? We want to be honest, We want to protect them. We want to respect they are capable of understanding. We want to instill in them the ability to work out what is scary. It’s a very personal line depending on the age, maturity and relationship you have with each of your children. Same goes for breaking bad news to siblings, and even parents and friends.

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 11 What to Say August 7. DAY 3. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from
Dutch Senft, Louise’s youngest son, who was 13 at the time of Archer’s accident. 

Steve Lepler, the Director of West End House Camp in Maine

Lisa Melancon, a friend of Louise’s and the mom of one of Dutch’s best friends in Baltimore

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#10 - Pray for Archer

#10 - Pray for Archer

 

No one called to tell her. Returning to the hospital from the first time she’d left Archer’s side, a pitstop at home for a few hours’ sleep and a shower, Louise was shocked and enraged at the situation she walked into. Tubes like garden hoses now protruded from Archer’s chest. Within a matter of hours, her son had undergone two emergency surgeries, and no one had called her. 

 

Feeling anger and bitterness surge through her like venom, Louise reminded herself to look for small mercies and sweet moments. One of her sons sat reading to his brother, who lay motionless next to him. Texts from friends. The power of a specific intention. The warmth of being called by name by someone who loves us. Even in chaos, even when your child looks like he is on a barbecue spit, grace and beauty surround us. 

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 10 Pray for Archer. August 7. DAY 3. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from
Nan Waller Burnett, Louise’s mediator friend from Denver

Mike Determan, Archer’s friend since grade school days in Baltimore

Kathie Okun, Louise’s friend in Baltimore from Women President’s Organization

Cathy Giannascoli, Mom of Danny Giannascoli, Louise’s friend, and the Senft’s summer neighbor in Cape May  

And many texters.

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#9 - Archer’s Tree Weeps Too: She Knows

#9 - Archer’s Tree Weeps Too: She Knows

 

Sweet but painful visuals as Louise looked around the house where a lacrosse stick, a razor, even a tree reminded her of the past, how it was, and the now. This tree that Archer grew up with “Archer’s tree” as they called her was the only tree in the area with leaves falling. It was as if she knew what had happened to Archer. As Louise surveyed the house, and the yard, she was bombarded by not only those details, but of everyday skills and tasks that we take for granted. Do you believe your emotions are the pathway healing? Louise does and invites us to love deeply. She also makes promises to God, the Divine, that she, Louise, will experience daily life as precious. 

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 9 Archer’s Tree Weeps Too: She Knows August 7. DAY 3. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from
Parker Mitchell, Archer’s good friend from Baltimore lacrosse and high school who was visiting the Senfts 

Danny Giannascoli, Archer’s good friend and Cape May neighbor whom he's grown up with

James Schmucker, Archer’s good friend in Cape May

Patty Schmucker, Mom of James and Jacqui Schmucker who both worked with Archer at the Beach Club

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#8 - The Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth

#8 - The Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth

 

Louise begged to know, “Will he get his hands back? He needs his hands because he’s an artist and a cook!” Truth is devastating and tough to swallow. The response was no different, “Not likely.” Sometimes people hold information that we are owed. They try to protect us by tucking it away until “the right time” or a better time to share it with us. They also withhold hope when the answer isn’t truly concrete and based in fact. There is not a good time to hear bad news. Sometimes you have to dig deep to find the truth and combine it from several sources, weigh it against what you want to believe and hope for, and what is factual. But it can be delivered with gentility, compassion, and love.

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 8 The Whole Truth and Nothing But the Truth August 6. DAY 2. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from  

Dr. Kris Radcliffe, a spinal surgeon with the Rothman Institute in Philadelphia. In August 2015, Dr. Radcliff was an associate professor of orthopedic surgery with a joint appointment in neurological surgery. On August 5, 2015, he was Archer’s neck surgeon 

Lisa Melancon, family friend and mother of one of Louise’s son Dutch’s best friends in Baltimore

Dr. Kelly Willham at AtlantiCare, New Jersey, a trauma surgeon in the ICU

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#7 - The Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda’s

#7 - The Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda’s

 

I could’ve insisted he do something else. I should’ve taken the time to see him again.

We could have prevented this.

Right? 

When our children experience trauma, we as parents are haunted, ripped apart, kept awake, and often paralyzed by notions of all we could’ve, should’ve, would’ve done. In this episode, Louise recalls Bill’s and her own such thoughts, which threatened to tear apart their marriage, and more importantly, their journey of releasing these damaging patterns of thinking, struggling to stand on solid ground in a chaotic unfamiliar Intensive Care Unit. 

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 7 The Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda’s August 6. DAY 2. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from 

Joanne Quenzer, a dear friend from Philadelphia who drove up from Cape May with a robust CVS care package

Davis Barsby, the Assistant Manager at the Beach Club and the head lifeguard at the time of the accident, and a lifelong friend of the Senft family

Danny Giannascoli, Archer’s good friend and Cape May neighbor whom he's grown up with 

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#6 - Prayer Warriors Unite!

#6 - Prayer Warriors Unite!

 

If you hear of another person’s tragic news and think there is really nothing you can do, please reconsider. There is something you can do. Louise asks for prayer, your prayer. See what happens when Louise texts a few friends that her family is in trouble and to pray hard.  “Stay strong” or “Keep the faith” are good concepts, but see what happens when the heart is stirred being called by name. Louise’s friend, Betty Hines shared, “Even those of different faith and different religions came together because this was about someone's child.”  Louise recalls a Dominican nun who taught at her high school answering her question about people of other faiths, or of no faith, telling her, “We are all called to be one”. 

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 6 Prayer Warriors Unite. August 6. DAY 2. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from 

Cathy Giannascoli, a friend in Pennsylvania and the Senft family’s summer neighbor in Cape May

Mike Determan, Archer’s friend from grade school days in Baltimore, Maryland,

Loretto Kane, a friend in Seattle, Washington, and Hospitalier of the Order of Malta

Betty Hines, another friend in Baltimore who had been chapter chair of Louise’s Women Presidents Organization group

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#5 - The Family Meeting

#5 - The Family Meeting

 

Pray hard…

It’s an uncomfortable room. The chairs are heavy, the air is still, and all eyes are on Dr. Kris Radcliff. This was a family meeting no one would ever forget.  Louise knew that a Family Meeting with Archer’s surgeon was her family’s chance to be together to ask questions. Like most of their other Family Meetings, it was an opportunity to discuss the good, the bad, and the ugly. But this time was different. It was far from their typical family meetings and would have a lasting impact. Through two interviews, Episode 4 explores this moment from both sides: through the eyes of Dr. Kris Radcliff, who performed Archer’s initial neck surgery, and from the perspective of Archer’s big sister, Paula Senft Easton. And, you’ll hear parts of a voice memo that was recently recovered from the night itself.

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 5 The Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda’s August 6. DAY 2. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from 

Paula Senft Easton, Louise’s eldest child, and only daughter who was 24 at the time of Archer’s accident and is today almost 30 and Associate Director of Admissions for the Friends School in Baltimore

Dr. Kris Radcliff, a spinal surgeon from the Rothman Institute in Philadelphia, and Archer’s initial neck surgeon at Atlanticare

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#4 - Tunnel Vision

#4 - Tunnel Vision

 

Tunnel Vision can happen when we are in trauma. As part of a survival instinct, our brain locks us into tunnel vision to stay focused on what is most essential at that moment. We have blinders on to all around us, including those who are trying to help. It's nothing personal, we are in love survival mode. But, even in Tunnel Vision, we can be aware enough to see the angels put in our path. In this episode of Blink of an Eye, Louise visits with several people who have first-hand experience with Tunnel Vision. She also talks about what if’s for hospitals.

 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 4 Tunnel Vision August 5. DAY 1. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from

Dewey Senft, Louise’s son who is 24 years old, and at the time of Archer’s accident was 19 in college. Dewey is now a fund accountant in Boston.

 Sue Wunder, a special ed teacher for 30 years in the Cape May County Special Services School District, New Jersey. Sue is also the mother of Robbie Wunder, a quadriplegic.

 Mary Lou Healy, a middle school math teacher at the Cathedral School and now Calvert Hall in Baltimore.

 Dr. Kris Radcliffe, a spinal surgeon with the Rothman Institute in Philadelphia and Archer’s neck surgeon at Atlanticare

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#3 - He Talked with God

#3 - He Talked with God

 

In the chaotic moments and hours immediately following Archer’s spinal cord injury, a series of “standard operating procedures” leads to more questions than answers. Scrambling for real answers, Louise realizes among scattered startling questions, the possibility of harm caused by hospitals’ policies set up for routine and risk management rather than healing. “My preference is to live” are words that will strike you deeply as she perseveres to experience the power of connecting cheek to cheek. 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 3 He Talked with God. August 5. DAY 1. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from
Davis Barsby, Assistant Manager of the Beach Club in Cape May, NJ, head Lifeguard, and dear family friend of the Senft family
Pete Senft, Louise's oldest son, who lives and Baltimore and was her advocate
Dr. Ken Williams, who has been the Senft family doctor in Baltimore since Archer was a young boy. #hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#2 - The Call

#2 - The Call

 

On a hot summer day in 2015, a prominent professional and mother of 5 receives the phone call that will change the rest of her — and her family’s — life.  One of her children, her son Archer, while at the beach, dove into the Atlantic Ocean for a quick, cooling swim as he’s done hundreds of times before. But this time, something went terribly wrong.  Join Louise for the powerful pilot episode of this extraordinary journey of life and death, trauma and epiphany, featuring the impact of trauma on her and others and interviews with people at the scene on both sides of a rapidly unfolding timeline of life-and-death decision-making. A remarkable story of loss, advocacy, and resilience begins. 

Join Louise for this episode of Blink of an Eye: Episode 2 The Call. August 5. DAY 1. In this episode, you will hear interview excerpts from

Jacqui Schmucker, a co-worker of Archer's that summer at the Beach Club,

Davis Barsby, the Assistant Manager at the Beach Club, the head lifeguard at the time of the accident, and a lifelong friend of the Senft family.

This episode is sponsored by the International Center for Spinal Cord Injury. Visit SpinalCordRecovery.org to learn more.

#hopeforeverything   #obtaineverything

#1 - The Story Behind Blink of an Eye - an Overview

#1 - The Story Behind Blink of an Eye - an Overview

 

Welcome to Blink of an Eye. I'm Louise Phipps Senft, your host. Together, we will explore life stories of trauma, loss, awakenings, and epiphanies, beginning with my own story when I got the Call that one of my 5 children, Archer, then a 6’2” teenager, was in a catastrophic diving accident at the beach, shattering his neck, rendering him paralyzed from the neck down. You will hear my written in real-time journal entries sent to my family that were later posted on social media and read daily by over 50,000 people who joined me and us in the fight to save Archer’s life. In Blink of an Eye, I will introduce you to some of the extraordinary people behind the scenes through guest interviews woven throughout the journal entry recordings.  And you will meet others with extraordinary life stories, as well as wise men and women with life-changing knowledge for healing that you and I can learn from, consider, and grow into, especially if you happen to face a crisis, a trauma, or a deep loss. 

 

Together, we will explore the true nature of our relationships and interconnectedness and how to advocate for what is possible even in the face of traumatic events that change everything.